About men: They have to do something, but also need a burning bush experience

It is generally not easy for a man to simply do nothing. When they are still boys, even doing the wrong things beats doing nothing and as a result they are often in trouble. Look I know there are exceptions to every generalisation, but most guys I know, myself included, feel very uncomfortable with inaction.

If you wnat to see what I mean, watch what happens to men when they are out of work. Some climb the wall, some go right over the wall, others just slump against the wall in misery and a few, like Winston Churchill express their pain by building a new wall. Its a very tough thing for a guy, because rightly or wrongly he is conditioned by life to be a provider. It is tough to let go of that and look to God as our provider - most men will really battle to make that transition, even very spiritual men.

About men: They need to be heroes ... but who needs another hero?

Ever since my boys were small, there was a budding hero in their hearts. They took to guns and weapons of mass distraction, faster than I can write these words. They were up drainpipes, launching themselves down flights of stairs onto precarious mattresses or walking along the edge of nothingness or exploding stufft that the CIA might find less than amusing, before they even had teeth - thank you Lord that their teeth came later and that they each have a spare set, for they really need it.

To this day they both dream of changing the world and ridding it of all the baddies out there. Both had far more effective solutions for Iraq, Iran, Zimbabwe and other trouble spots of this earth, than the trillions of dollars the US spent in coming to a non-resolution.

About men: one of their greatest needs is to be needed

Decades ago, African men were defined by their prowess. They would carry spear and shields, chant war songs and go off to do battle, if not with their enemy, then with the antelope that frequented their grassy plains. After a hard day’s work the women would cook the food and wait on their warriors. But as the sun retreated below the tall stands of savanna and the thorn trees that stood sentry along the shadowed escarpments, the men would sit around their fires, drinking beer and sharing stories, the light in their eyes enflamed by the legends of bygone eras.

Sadly the world no longer needs their strength. They still stand in huddled groups around brazen fires, where flickering street lights enflame their empty eyes, as they shelter from the emptiness beyond … until the grey shafts of morn restore life to the cold, stone flagstones.

About men: they are caught in a conflict of expectations, that point back to God

My family has been through a long season of struggle. After a series of life-class setbacks, the final blow came with the failure of a business and my inability to get reemployed. That resulted in the loss of our life savings and many other deep struggles. Well, such is life. God has been faithful anyway and He has always provided our daily bread. He has also used our experience to shape us to His will and to equip us for whatever lies ahead.

Yesterday my wife had an honest moment with me. Now that we are at the bottom of the barrel she questioned whether I was doing enough to address the crisis. The fact that I have faced countless disappointments, is besides the point, but as she expressed disappointment in me for failing to meet her needs, I in turn said, “I feel the same about God”.

About men: Why men outperform women

Men best women in almost every sphere of achievement. It is empirically true. The best chefs are men, men are better in almost every known sport, in non-athletic sports like golf or sailing, men still outrank women. Throughout biblical history, there was one female judge, no female monarchs, but endless male leaders. Throughout human history, men have built roads, bridges, empires and great structures. Men invented and perfected aircraft, motor cars, the space shuttle, weapons … they have excelled everywhere.

About men: We don't need another hero

Ever since my boys were tots they have cried out "watch me Dad", before diving down a full staircase onto the mattresses far below or exploding a home-made incendiary device or doing a double-somersault into the pool or walking along a parapet above a 3,000 foot sheer drop or launching a rocket or, more recently, to review their academic progress. I never had girls so I can't comment on that, already complex mystery.

The need for approval and recognition is a powerful driver in men. It was the key driver behind all the greatest waves of history. Unfortunately it is also misplaced.

So having upset a whole lot of ladies I am now upsetting a whole lot of guys

About men: they have greater needs for identity

One of the greatest needs of men is directly linked to one of their greatest vulnerabilities: the toughest of men are all susceptible to their egos. As such a little woman can stand up to a big man and tear him down with words or rejections.

The Scots have the most unshakable accent in the world. I have met Scots that are more than 50 years removed from their homeland, but whose accents are as stubborn as ever. I once heard of a woman who applied for a job. A condition of employment was to lose the accent, which she did, thereby proving that it is possible to shake, even if it is undesirable to do so. That stubbornness is because their cultural identities (kilts, bagpipes, traditions, symbols, food) are so strong and vivid, which firmly anchors the Scots to their roots.

About men: who are you? There are just many mixed signals

Society is facing more moral dilemmas than ever. For ages homosexuality was a closet sin and so were many other social issues, but now it has become a social sin to suppress what was once frowned on. It is now more wrong to speak right, truth has become an opinion and society has opted for the ten suggestions.

We have a litany of social issues, but in decrying the symptoms have lost sight of the causes. Doctors may treat root cause, not symptoms, but more money can be made from symptomatic treatments. Rather than understand why we feel the way we do, we revert to placebos, pain killers, anti-depressants and so on.

As with homosexuality, many have reverted to rather simplistic right/wrong debates. There was a time when the priests of Israel used the Urim and Thummin (yes/no, guilty/not guilty) method of divination. They were bones or stones that the user cast to the ground as a somewhat arbitrary method of discernment. It was used by Joshua to (correctly) single out Achan for the offence he brought on the nation when he took forbidden loot from Jericho.

About men: the real role of Father-hood is a noble calling

This cartoon says it all on this Father's day 2010. A busy father was nagged by his son to go fishing. Eventually he could not put it off so he cleared a day in his diary and did it (I don't like fishing either, but I love being with my sons). Afterwards the father wrote in his diary, "worst day of my life". The boy subsequently died in an accident and the father had to tidy up his room, a process that stumbled on the boy's diary. As the father sat down to page through the book he came to the day when the two went fishing - the inscription said, "best day of my life".

The lesson in this story is for fathers to never underestimate their value to growing chidren. There is evidence that the sexual identity of boys and girls is derived from their fathers as is their concept of an angry, absent or loving God.

About men: Biblical manhood

I have often heard leaders defend a masculine model of manhood, arguing that a man must be sweaty and brawny. Why do we need to tidy up incongruencies by putting people into stereotypical boxes and why do we insist on selecting leaders based on impressions whilst God looks on the unseen heart?

The fact is that like so like so many others, I am not that good at sport, nor am I brawny. My center of gravity is more in my heart and mind. I am a thinker and, like David, very reflective – a writer of poetry and books. I have also paid many prices for standing my ground on issues of consequence. Many other men who would pass the brawn and sweat test, still fail where it most counts – in their responsibilities to life and family.

About men: The home shepherd

In a previous article I showed that Jacob, Abel, Moses, David and Abraham were all shepherds. They were not distinguished by their physical prowess or sweat capital. God despised those things that we so often associate with manhood: sweat, strength and initiative. He looked beyond those obvious externalities and sifted people to find men who could ably steward his kingdom.

God’s men all happened to have learnt about stewardship though shepherding. God used that to demonstrate the contrasts between them and the men he rejected in their favor. Thus Esau and Cain both leaned on their manly skills but failed to impress, whilst Jacob and Abel deferred to their pastoral skills to win the favor of God.

I have often heard men preach on “manliness” and have felt that in doing so they generally missed the point. Godly manhood certainly does not disdain strength (take Peter as an example). Rather it emphasizes pastoral values.

About men: All or nothing

I recently had the need to explore work opportunities away from home. My own drought drove me as it once did for Abraham and Jacob. However, at the last moment God intervened, shut the door and pointed me in another direction. It was almost like the knife had been poised over my family when the angel intervened.

It reminded me that God is so relational. He will never, ever divide relationships, especially families. He told Abraham to offer His son to make that very point - that unlike the pagan system, His value does not turn our most treasured relationships into sacrifices.

Oh of course we don't do human sacrifices anymore - we just offer our families on the economic or career altar, allowing the most treasured of all relationships to suffer for the sake of a thankless system. But God is not like that at all. Indeed, performance is of little or no consequence to Him at all. Obdeience is far more valuable than sacrifice. We can make whatever sacrifices to the system, be it time, money, convenience or lifestyle, but it all means nought to God - for divine progress derives from obedience to God's laws and principles.

There is a more salient point though. When Abraham sired a half son through Hagar, God made the point that for all his potency as a man (and Abraham was evidently very potent given the children he sired after the death of Sarah), the promise was two-edged - it vested in him and his wife. Just as a seed cannot germinate without an egg, so we are incapable of stewarding God's promises except in covenant with our life partners.

Far too many men feel that what happens out there is down to their prowess or ego - and many women have fallen for the same lie. To God it is all or nothing. Moses, Joshua and Caleb were great men, but God refused to let them go into the promised land without Israel, for the nation was the chosen vessel of God, not the individuals making up that nation.

So too with our families and indeed with the church - the individual for all his or her gifted-ness, is of little value alone, but is of awesome value and power within the context of the greater whole, for therein lies the fullest expression of His heart. God is relational - He never built the kingdom alone and He sure will not allow any of us to go it alone - its all, or nothing.

(c) Peter Eleazar@www.4u2live.net

About men: Root out the ants

My home was inundated with ants, but it amazed me how organized they were. If food dropped on the floor, news quickly reached the rest of the colony. As their chances of getting it all are always limited, they attack food furiously to get it back to the nest before it is too late.

Individual workers go out foraging and when they find a real prize they leave a pheromone trail on the way back to the nest. Other ants then follow the trail and if they confirm the find, they do their own pheromone number until they are all doing it.

About men series: What is the value of a man?

The blood, sweat and toils of brave men laid the foundations of human development, but the world we live in seems intent on rendering men redundant. They have contributed so much to history and the modern world owes them such a debt of gratitude, yet the same world seems to have fotgotten all that went before. It seems that society has lost its sense of the value of a man. Is it just my perception? What do you think?

In times before time, men fought wild beasts and rival tribes to preserve the gene-pool that became the stepping off point for modern civilization. They also crafted primitive tools and then developed those into ever more sophisticated instruments that became the key building-blocks of human advancement. Later they applied their sweat, power and specialist skills to tame the accursed soil and extract its abundant riches.

Through the middle ages, masons devoted their brief life-times to the building of churches, castles, battlements and villages, many of which still stand to this day thanks to profound craftsmanship, unstinting commitment and a willingness to defend their heritage to the last man. From the dawn of the industrial age, men hunked heavy objects and drove dangerous machines in appalling conditions, to provide the new world with its vital infrastructure. Then through the 20th century tens of millions of young men laid down their lives to protect the free world from dark, oppressive forces. Thanks to them the modern world is not led by mad-men, but by reasonable people who have preserved the order that others fought so hard to establish.